January 12, 2007

Where are the Male Baby Showers?!?

*The views expressed in this blog are not the real representative of how I think of my coming child or views on how things should be, this post is merely exaggerated view of those thought and for pure comical merit. I will be a good father, so this doesn’t express my true intentions of fatherhood lol*

Where are the Male baby showers? I mean let’s set the picture, the classic picture of the big chair in the center with the mother to be getting all this attention and all these gifts, the father to be, surrounded by hordes of women oouuu and ahhhhing, makes him retreat to some backroom to watch the current game or some other show. The end of it wraps with him struggling to carry all the gifts they got downstairs to the car while the mother to be remains to chat and socialize. Leaving him to fend for himself, amongst huge boxes and bags.

What’s up with that? Yes understandable women have to carry the child for 9 months and go through that pain of labor, but after that society as a whole is gonna be looking at me to provide for this little rug rat (not that I think my child in anyway is a rug rat, the term is purely used for dramatization purposes). For the rest of this child’s life up until some 18-23 years I’m going to have to do everything in my power to make sure this child has food, clothing, shelter, happiness, and more. Where is the attention I get for that?

What we need to have is a Male Baby Shower. Have a group of guys, and some females for cooking purposes lol. We would get together, talk about what is about to happen to me, have the other guy crack jokes about how my life is about to get wack, hard, worse, and other because of the child. You know the “well you can’t do this no more cause of the child”, “kiss …. goodbye now”, “Guess you won’t be …..with us no more huh”, and other jokes of the fashion. Then the guys could get me gifts a father really needs lol. Earplugs for when that little rug rat doesn’t want to stop crying, gift cards to come tech store like Best Buy or J & R, cause less face it, the bulk of his money won’t be used on new gadgets any more. I don’t know if it’s been invent, but someone needs to make Cold Shower in a Can, and give that as a gift, cause he isn’t going to be getting none no time soon. After the gift changing there could be games as well, but none of those games played at the traditional baby showers. I don’t know what do you think guys? lol